Dirk Hayhurst tweets regarding his impending Surgery.

by JohnnyG on Feb 3, 2010 6:41 PM EST

Anyone that is on twitter should be following Dirk, he can found here http://twitter.com/TheGarfoose on twitter and is just an amazingly good read even in 140 character intervals.

What follows is a list of the tweets that took place after the Jays announced that Dirk would undergo exploratory surgery, they range from classic Dirk comedy to very serious at the end. I am sure we all wish Dirk well on the road to recovery and best wishes for the upcoming season.

Sorry I wasn't able to reply to all your wonderful well-wishes, ironically, I was at the doctor! Thank you very, very much for the support
That being said, I have some good news and some bad news concerning the surgery. Bad news first.
It looks like they are going to have to amputate my entire right arm off and start fresh. Just throw the whole thing out.

The good news is, Dr. Claw is retiring from chasing Inspector Gadget to do the surgery. The are replacing my right arm with a super arm

Adamantium infused, bionic, indestructible pitching arm developed by the genius of Tony Stark and Optimus Prime. Forged under Garfoose flame

Dr. Claw, having overseen surgery on his own bionic hands, will be brought in by the jays to head my operation. He's and expert in the field

Thankfully, medical science has come a long way since Claw's hands were done (a unfortunate cider press accident)-my arm will look life like

My new arm will also support bluetooth, xm radio, and HD channels in 1080p. Plus, it has it's own facebook page.

I can also come with removable tattoo patches so one day I can sport Barbed wire, the next I can rock an Iron Cross.

All in all, I should come back stronger then before, and Major League insurance is covering all of it as long as I don't use it for evil... (editors note, as this point I sent him a message telling him to go ahead and use it for evil.... more fun that way)

The Next twitter contest will be for my signed old arm. Though you'll have to sign some biohazard waivers before collecting your prize

I am discussing a proposal with Rogers right now to see if they"ll cut me a deal on an in arm cell plan so I can tweet between pitchers.

Between pitches. sorry... Or pitchers, that could be interesting too.

Here Dirk starts to get serious and even though it is very short you have to feel for the guy, and I for one can't help but worry along with him.

SERIOUSLY. I won't know the particulars of the injury until after I wake from the operation, hence exploratory.
Obviously it's unnerving because it's not just my arm on the operating table. It's my house payment, my grocery bills, my whole future.
I'd be lying if I wasn't a little worried, but the docs have given me ample reason to be hopeful as they think it's going to be minor.
With that in mind, I am who I am, so I make humor to help ease the tension. But now you know what I know, and I'm sure everything will be OK

Good luck Dirk. I will be pulling for you the entire season, hope to see you in the Jays pen this year at some point.

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Comments

thanks for putting that up, johnny

and get well soon, dirk. i suggest asking optimus prime for the specs on that axe that glows orange that he swaps out for his hand when he battles megatron in hand-to-hand combat

"Look at me! I'm Tomokazu Ohka of the Montreal Expos!"

by jessef on Feb 3, 2010 7:05 PM EST reply actions

geek.

by Tom Dakers on Feb 3, 2010 7:11 PM EST up reply actions

About once a week (maybe more, not really sure) Dirk asks 5 questions on twitter in regards to his recent tweets and various videos and links he has put up. The winner gets some sort of prize usually something signed like a ball or something.

But last night he did a video with “Optimus Prime”, it was a webcam set up with a toy Prime that he moved onto the screen and made talk.

The guy is a comic genius.

Life as a Toronto Sports Fan?... *sigh*... It is what it is...

by JohnnyG on Feb 3, 2010 7:11 PM EST up reply actions