FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
Munenori Kawasaki 2013 MLB All-Star Write-In Campaign Launched
Toronto, Ontario - April 25, 2013 - The Citizens United to Yell "Kawasaki!!!!" Super PAC (or "Kawasaki Super PAC" for short) has endorsed Munenori Kawasaki as the Toronto Blue Jays' shortstop candidate to the 2013 Major League Baseball All-Star Game, and are officially launching the "Munenori Kawasaki Write-In Campaign" in downtown Toronto this afternoon.
"We were big fans of Jose Reyes and his energy, but he attendance record on the field is has been less than stellar lately," announced a spokesperson for Kawasaki Super PAC, "we feel that Blue Jays and baseball fans everywhere would benefit from someone who is ready to play everyday to represent them in the All-Star Game, and I can't think of a better person than Munenori Kawasaki."
An enthusiastic supporter chimed in, "he will bring change to the tired, old baseball-as-usual. He'll restore our future back the simpler, stronger, and freer American League team we remember as kids," and added, "I came from Vancouver so I can basically see Japan from my house!"
Kawasaki Super PAC believes that it makes very good sense for Major League Baseball released the 2013 All-Star Ballot earlier this week, because fans can vote for players based on the first 20 games played. Instead of wasting your time waiting for "large sample sizes" to go through complex "statistics" and "numbers", fans can simply look in to their hearts and feel which candidate will be the best shortstop for the American League All-Star team. The WAR-mongers has not developed a number for it but it is obvious that no one is more suited to twirling bats, talk to his helmet, do a Lo Viste-Bow, or mount a teammate, than Munenori Kawasaki. And isn't that what baseball's founders would have wanted?
Fans would find that voting for Kawasaki is very easy. They can go to this link and scroll all the way down to the bottom of the page (or, press "page down") where it says "Write-In." On the left where it says "Select Club", click and choose "Blue Jays", and where it says "Select Position", choose "Shortstop". Then, type in "Munenori" beside "First Name" and "Kawasaki" beside "Last Name", click "Continue", fill in the information in the next screen and click "Submit Your Vote".
Explaining about the voting process, the spokesperson said, "freedom-loving Munenori Kawasaki supporters won't need to type his name over and over, they can just keep entering the validation key and click 'Submit Your Vote' again and again for up to 25 times!"
Kawasaki Super PAC is looking to encourage people on social media to make the hash-tag #WriteInKawasaki to be as popular as other Blue Jays-related ones like #LoveThisTeam, #FireGibby, and #R.A.Dickey.