Sprant #2

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Sprant [N.] A rant, or tirade that is written by Spor.

Good Evening/Afternoon/Morning all.

Back to some Bluejays baseball are we? Let's get on May 2.0 here boys.

1. Country Style Clobby: I used to really like our center fielder. Then i said "he's meh". Now i feel like he's a make shift big leaguer. He's batting .165 at home, and .246 away. So neither one of those stats are particularly good, but it feels worse because he almost never delivers a clutch hit at home to win a series, and make a crowd go home happy. So then I started thinking, maybe he's better on the road because of the turf. His splits are a .157 on turf (here and The Trop) and .274 on grass. I realize that this is close to the home/road split because there are only two stadiums with turf fields, but the point i'm going to make is you can't blame the turf because the batters box is on a FREAKING DIRT CIRCLE. DIRT. NOT TURF. NOT GRASS. JUST DIRT. If you get a solid basehit on a line drive, It doesn't matter what surface you're on. Cause it's dirt. So I looked more into what His problem could be. He has regular Lefty/Righty splits (1.59/2.26 respectively), and is batting .227 vs .204 in day vs night games. Pretty much the same, no huge discrepancy there. So basically Colby is just a hitter that rarely will get one hit a game and when he does you can guarantee outs in the other at bats. You think I'm Wrong? Ok then Here's another stat . Through the 70 games he's played in, Colby has had 9 Multi-hit affairs. To quote his walk up song (Boys 'Round Here, Blake Shelton) He has to spend less time "drinkin that ice cold beer, talkin bout girls, talkin bout trucks", and more time in the cages with our Seitzerific hitting coach. Whenever I see him hit all I want to do is.... Well punch a Watermelon.

2. If you come back, will you still be Japaneeeese? : Munenori Kawasaki has performed quite well in his last ten games, Hitting .324 in 34 at bats. Also, even though he only has 2 walks in that time period, he has been masterful at working the count. I was starting to think we could have a nice fill in at second base, and let AA focus on trying to find us a different position where there is currently a hole instead of the middle infield. But, that dream was absolutely crushed to bits and pieces when I saw him walk back to the dugout while at the trop. My dad actually called it, I didn't see it at first, but as he walked back he pointed and said "Muni's got something going on in his leg, hopefully he isn't injured". Nice prediction SporSr. {Off Topic, he is actually the one who introduced me to bluebird banter, as he comes here to read what he calls "interesting and informing articles about the jays", even though he doesn't have an SB Nation account.} So I'm hoping that he will perform to the ability that he was in his last stretch. Also, I'm not gonna make a whole section toward it, but it's really a shame that the same thing happened to Nolan Reimold. He was looking sharp, and would've been nice to have him on the team. Perhaps as a platoon with Lind at DH when there is a lefty on the mound, and at first too since EE is out for a couple more weeks. And I had to see that too. Sucked. But they won the game at least. But didn't win the series. What a surprise. FanFlippingTastic.

3. I WANT A REAL THRID BASEMEN: WIth the terrible performance of the Juan/Reyes combo in the hole between third and short, both seeming to say "nah we 2 cool 4 dat" whenever a ball is hit that way, I'm desperate for a real third basemen. Someone with fire in his gameplay, someone who drinks more red bull than the liquid capacity of Niagara Falls. Someone who when runs out of room inside him for the red bull pours it over his head. Hmm... I wonder if there's anyone like that. Oh yeah. Don't we have that Brett guy whose injured? I really wan't him to come back, because he could be a spark plug for us down the stretch and ignite a flame under us for a playoff surge. But because injuries are uncertain, we need to reach out and pick up someone like that. No Cole Gillespie carp (who , No Brad Mills carp. A real big name player. Big risk big reward. Just go for it AA, get us to the playoffs. Will he do anything like that? Nah he 2 cool 4 dat.

Also, at the end of each sprant, i will include a comment question, which the answers to can be posted by commenting, and a Poll.

Comment Question: What is the best and worst walk-up song you've ever heard?

Editor's Note: This is a FanPost written by a reader and member of Bluebird Banter. It was not commissioned by the editors and is not necessarily reflective of the opinions of Bluebird Banter or SB Nation.

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